Your average 14 year old

OOC:

Sorry about that.

I love you all.

Thanks to

http://askcroconaw.tumblr.com

http://asksquirtle.tumblr.com

http://askbanette.tumblr.com

Thanks for turning a life around

DON’T READ IF YOU DON’T CARE.

DON’T READ IF YOU DON’T CARE.

OOC:

I thought that things were getting better; but I take a second look, and realize. Things are still just as confusing and unknown. I have people who love me and support me, thanks to you guys, and the friends I’ve made IRL who help me through life…

But I still feel like I’m holding something back. It just builds.

Each day, the tiredness grows. It’s building up, like a tower; waiting to collapse…

As I wait for mine.

I feel like just one of these days, I won’t have the strength to carry on. But I’ll still keep pushing myself, to satisfy what others expect of me.

And I’ll be honest, I don’t think anyone’s actually expecting me to say shit like this.

Excuse me for my french, but… Really.

I thought my life was going great; and I look back at myself and think; “Why was I thinking that?”

It feels FUCKING HORRIBLE.

Each time; I recover from this.

Only to find out that it was still there, all along.

Every. Single. Time.

I’m a mess. I don’t even know what the purpose of going on is, anymore.

Really.

Think about it in reality for a few moments.

Are we all going to wind up doing something that’ll send us down in history? Are weall going to be successful in life? Are we all going to find love?

Reality. What a harsh word. Everyone has a reality, one that they usually enjoy.

I hate having to wake up to reality in the end. I sometimes wish I was in a never ending dream, a dream where I truly felt like everyone cared about me. A dream where I truly believed that there was a reason to go on.

The reason.

That’s the question.

Is there really a reason? I want to know the answer to this. I keep on thinking this through, and through, and through. But down to the most basic level… Is there a reason? Why give us existence… When it is just taken away at the end?

I feel like the kid who sits out of the game, because he doesn’t feel like playing. He wants to go home, and not have to worry about winning; or losing. Just, peace.

And you know what I don’t get?

"It gets better." Don’t tell me it gets better when all throughout my life…

It only wound up worse.

I feel that death would be a very, very, sweet release from it all.

Grades, Success, College, Love, Career, Passions…

Death sounds like a good deal.

I’m sorry if I sound like an attention whore. This is the one place that I could express how I feel to the world without anyone I know IRL being worried.

Well actually… There’s the Pokeathlon. |:

Well actually… There’s the Pokeathlon. |:

Jaaaaaayyyyyy i love youuu :3

You know i love you backkkk C:

To Start Things Off

To get people excited.

I GOT CONCERT MASTER FOR MY ORCHESTRA YAY. THAT MEANS FIRST CHAIR. \o/

flygonin60seconds:

Reel Big Fish - “Take on Me”

Seeing them live was amazing.